Closing in on a decade has a way of making you reflect on your life so far and the choices you’ve made.

When I turned 29, I felt this weight land on my shoulders. I was almost 30! How did this happen? Where did the time go?

I started thinking about the life younger me had envisioned for myself. With that came the disappointment that I hadn’t achieved the life I wanted or even gotten close to it.

This prompted me to take a good, long look at my life and the choices I made.

I worked in a career I didn’t enjoy since I was 20. I felt stuck in it. I felt disconnected from myself and the dreams I once had.

This was a little depressing to say the least.

So, I started journaling more, trying to reconnect with myself and the life I wanted. I didn’t even know what I wanted anymore.

I used journal prompts to find direction in my life. 

Journaling lead me somewhere I always wanted to go but resisted for fear of not being “talented enough”.

Read More: Don’t Give Up! Keeping Chasing Your Dream Life and Achieving Your Goals with this One Motivating Challenge!

I loved drawing as a kid. It was one of my favorite ways to pass the time. I would doodle on my homework, on the church pamphlets on Sundays, and in all my notebooks.

It was so fun to come up with new characters, like Super Fry Guy, a French fry superhero I made up one day during Sunday service. Or Molly the Milkshake who was the sassy love interest for Super Fry Guy.

But I wasn’t exactly “naturally talented” at drawing. Nobody ever said what a great artist I was or that they enjoyed my cartoon characters.

My sister was the naturally talented artist in our family. She could draw or paint animals that looked like a photograph.

I envied her, I really did. Everyone loved her artwork. But truthfully, I just wasn’t interested in drawing realistic animals, landscapes, or items. I enjoyed my cartoonish style of drawing.

As I grew up and the pressure of having a career started to settle in, I realized I couldn’t do anything with my art. It just wasn’t “good enough” and I wasn’t “talented enough”.

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Read More: 33 Journal Prompts to Find Your Direction When You Feel Lost in Life or Stuck 

So, I went to beauty school when I was 19 and started working full time as a barber when I was 20.

But it was an exhausting job that left me feeling drained, irritated, and itchy (little hairs everywhere).

Being a barber is great if you’re extroverted. But if you recharge your batteries by being alone, this job is mentally exhausting and it’s physically tiring as well.

I was young and already spent the money on beauty school. I didn’t want to quit. And I was at least good at this trade. I was a skilled barber, so I figured this must be what I’m supposed to do.

But I wasn’t happy.

I wasn’t happy for a very long time. I was overworked and depleted.

But when I turned 29, I knew something had to change before I turned 30. I couldn’t continue down this path of cutting hair and feeling unfulfilled and drained.

After journaling using prompts to find my passion in life, I started to notice a pattern in what was lacking in my life.

Drawing.

Read More: Nicole’s Inspiring Story on Chasing Her Passion and Changing Her Career to Pursue Art

When I realized I missed drawing, I didn’t allow any excuses to enter my mind. Maybe I’m not “naturally talented” (which after speaking with professional illustrator Nicole I felt way better about this) but I could learn.

I could get a little bit better every time I picked up a marker, a pencil, or my apple pen.

By allowing myself to be bad at something, I was able to start improving on those skills. I got out of my own way.

I decided to sign up for an online workshop for drawing kawaii ice cream characters taught by Tatyana Deniz at the Kawaii Drawing Club. I also purchased the eBook workbook that you could work on before the workshop to get some basics down.

I worked in the workbook everyday leading up to the workshop. It lit me up from the inside.

This excited happiness washed over me as I scribbled away on my iPad in Procreate.

I couldn’t believe how much enjoyment I was getting already.

Joining the Kawaii Drawing Club helped me get more comfortable not only with Procreate, but also with my own abilities to draw and improve my skillset.

I loved following the tutorials and adding my own creativity to the illustrations.

*If you want to gain more creative confidence in just one week, subscribe to my newsletter to receive your FREE copy of the 7-Day Confidence Building Workbook*

Soon, I also joined Lisa Bardot’s Art Makers Club to learn more styles of illustrating.

And then I signed up for Skillshare to learn from even more artists and illustrators.

One of my favorite things about Skillshare for learning a medium like drawing is there are so many teachers and courses, you get a huge variety. This is helping me learn what I like and don’t like and developing my own style.

There are several topics taught on Skillshare including photography, baking, painting, etc. There’s truly something for everyone.

One of my favorite courses on Skillshare was this course on mid century modern cookbook illustrations. My finished piece from that class is below.

Having all these tutorials at my fingertips was exciting! I even took a course on Skillshare on using Tombow Dual Brush Pens from one of my favorite illustrators Shea O’Connor. I hadn’t drawn with markers in years, but it was so much fun!

For so many years I told myself I couldn’t draw and that I wasn’t any good at it.

But here I was proving myself wrong. I loved and still love the illustrations I was creating. And I was having fun!

Yes, there’s room for improvement, but that’s okay. That’s actually better than okay. It’s fantastic!

I have something I enjoy working on and getting better at. I have something that challenges me in the best possible way.

Read More: 11 Easy Creative Hobbies Women Can Start Today to Boost Their Confidence

I’m not a professional illustrator or artist. Not yet anyways.

I made an Instagram account (@kayladonndesigns if you’d like to check it out) where I stated in my bio that I will post 3 times a week.

I have 100 followers, so it’s not like anyone would be upset if I don’t post. But stating that in my bio helps to keep me accountable.

Instead of letting excuses fill my head (which they still try to do about not being “good enough”) I remind myself that I promised to post 3 times a week. So that’s what I’m going to do.

I’m still figuring out my illustration style by taking lots of different courses on Skillshare and following tutorials on the Art Makers Club and the Kawaii Drawing Club, and even some on YouTube.

I don’t where this journey will take me but I’m along for the ride. Maybe one day I will be a professional illustrator, or maybe I’ll just add more of my illustrations to this blog. Who knows?

But that’s what makes it fun!

Starting to do something again that once made you happy is a journey. It can be an emotional one too.

In the beginning of my drawing journey, I was hard on myself for not starting sooner. That did me no good, though, so I quickly turned that voice in my head down.

It doesn’t matter when you start whether you’re 29 or 59. All that matters is you start pursuing the thing that makes you the happiest.

So often we hold ourselves back for fear of not being “good enough” or “talented enough”. But like Babe Ruth once said, “You just can’t beat the person who never gives up.”

Consistent practice triumphs over talent every time.

It’s time to get out of your own way and start your journey towards living a more fulfilled, happier life pursuing your dream.

*If you want to gain more creative confidence in just one week, subscribe to my newsletter to receive your FREE copy of the 7-Day Confidence Building Workbook*

Journaling is my favorite way to get to the heart of the matter.

One of the best journal prompts for discovering what you’re interested in is to journal about things you enjoyed doing as a kid. 

Did you love to draw or color? Did you enjoy playing dress up or finger painting? Did you like coming up with little stories or writing about fantasy worlds? 

Ask yourself what you loved doing as a kid before life got in the way.

If you’re not sure what you’re passionate about or what you’d like to pursue check out this post on 5 easy ways to find your passion.

Please don’t procrasinate on this step. Otherwise you’ll be like me and regret all the time you wasted. 

After finding what you’re interested in through journaling, make a list of the supplies you need to explore this interest. 

It could be paint canvases, a sketchbook, markers, colored pencils, an ipad, etc. 

Now that you have your list of supplies, go get them! You don’t have to buy top of the line. Just get something you can start with. 

Once the supplies you need are in your home, it’ll be hard to ignore. You already spent the money, you might as well use them, right? 

Signing up for something like Skillshare  is so beneficial because it’s a starting point. 

I was intimidated when I first started drawing. I didn’t trust myself to draw something “good”.

I didn’t know where to start or even what to draw. 

But by following tutorials on Skillshare and taking courses on art fundamentals, I’ve started to see a huge improvement in my confidence. 

I now happily draw without a tutorial, but I needed to start from somewhere. 

And to be honest, I’m still learning and once a week take a course on Skillshare about art fundamentals, procreate, character design, etc. 

Now that you know what you want to explore, have the tools and resources, it’s time to start creating! 

Put your pen to paper or paintbrush to canvas and have fun! 

If you decide the current interest you’re exploring, isn’t the right one for you, that’s more than okay!

Creativity is all about exploration. 

Go back to your journal and maybe incorporate some other prompts to discover a different interest you want to try out.

Rinse and repeat the steps. Buy different supplies, take a course on your new interest, and create something for yourself.

The main thing is don’t give up trying to find what brings you joy. 

 Let me know how rediscovering your joy is going by emailing me kayla[@]chasingsundaypancakes.com.